One of the hardest things to grasp is when someone is not living up to your expectations. Could be your boss, colleague, partner, spouse. They simply do not "bring to the party" what you want or need. And, try as you might, you cannot get them to change. Of course not. Because they can't. They simply do not bring what you need to the party. You want them to bring chips & dip, and they bring pickles. So stop beating your head against a wall. Recognize they have limitations. Once you get this, you can begin to navigate the situation, and get what you want.
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